Carolyn Baynes, 2026 Why is there a worldwide increase in young adults unable to step out into the world? At a stage of life we typically associate with energy, hope, and exploration, many young people instead experience paralysis. What emerges is a profound social withdrawal—leaving them isolated, often burdened with shame and self-doubt. Thoughts like:“What’s …
Why is there a worldwide increase in young adults unable to step out into the world?
At a stage of life we typically associate with energy, hope, and exploration, many young people instead experience paralysis. What emerges is a profound social withdrawal—leaving them isolated, often burdened with shame and self-doubt.
Thoughts like:
“What’s wrong with me?”
“Why can’t I just be normal and get a job?”
These are frequently intensified by comparison—especially in a world shaped by social media, where others’ lives appear effortlessly in motion.
In Japan, this pattern of withdrawal has become so widespread it has a name: Hikikomori. Increasingly, however, we are seeing that this is not confined to one culture. It is a global phenomenon.
A Different Lens: Sensitivity as Strength
In his 2014 TED Talk, Psychosis or Spiritual Awakening, Phil Borges explores how some Indigenous cultures respond to adolescent distress. Rather than pathologizing or medicating, young people are supported, mentored, and guided.
Their sensitivity is not seen as weakness—but as a gift.
They are understood as potential healers.
This perspective raises an important question:
What if something similar is happening here?
What if some young people cannot simply “carry on” because they are being called to go deeper—to reflect, to heal, to make sense of a world that feels overwhelming or out of balance?
Hikikomori as a Signal, Not a Failure
Rather than viewing social withdrawal as dysfunction, we might see it as a signal.
Like the canary in the coal mine, these young people may be showing us something vital about the pressures, disconnection, and imbalance in modern life.
This is not just individual—it is collective.
How Internal Family Systems (IFS) Helps
Internal Family Systems (IFS) offers a powerful, non-pathologizing framework.
In IFS, withdrawal is not seen as something “wrong” with the person. Instead, it is understood as a protective part—one that has developed for good reason.
For example, this part may be:
- Protecting against making the “wrong” life decisions
- Holding unresolved trauma that needs care and attention
- Responding to a world that feels unsafe or overwhelming
In therapy, clients are supported to gently get to know these protective parts, rather than fight them.
Over time, these parts begin to trust the client’s Self—the calm, compassionate core within all of us.
As that trust grows, something shifts:
- The paralysis softens
- Clarity emerges
- Courage begins to build
What We Can Learn as a Society
There are important lessons here for families, communities, and culture:
- Avoid pathologizing: Labels can shape identity in limiting ways, especially at a formative stage of life
- Offer understanding, not pressure: Urgency and shame often deepen withdrawal
- Value mentorship: Skilled, compassionate support can help young people make sense of their inner world
- Trust the process: Even when it looks like “stuckness,” something meaningful may be unfolding
A Gentle Invitation to Reach Out
If you are a young adult experiencing social withdrawal, or if you are concerned about someone who is, you are not alone—and there is a way through.
IFS therapy offers a compassionate and deeply respectful approach to understanding what is happening inside.
If this resonates with you, I warmly invite you to get in touch.
You can reach me at: info@carolynbaynes.co.uk
Taking that first step can feel difficult—but it may also be the beginning of something profoundly healing.
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